Why Awai (A-why)?

In Japanese, my last name, Ayama is written as 綾間 (Aya-ma). Many years ago, one of my ancestors were adopted by the Aya-ma family to take over the name, so in fact, we’re the only Ayamas left in the world with these characters.

To be honest, I never took much time to understand my name growing up. Only recently did I start getting interested about my heritage and where I come from.

For those that are familiar with the Chinese language, you probably have seen this character 間 - which means “in between”. I always thought that the only way to read this was either “Ma” or “Aida”. Though through my search, I learned that there was another pronunciation… “Awai”.

あわい(Awai): The space between the known and the unknown. The unexplainable between the black and white.

As soon I saw this definition, it landed… The frustration I’ve had towards the incredibly polarised world we live in, the lack of belonging I’ve felt my entire life, the feeling I’ve had about not being able to fully agree with either one of my colleagues because neither were wrong and both were right. It made sense.

In a world that consistently pushes towards defining what's right or wrong, black or white, some may perceive avoiding these extremes as cowardly. But what if staying in the in-between is the most courageous thing one can do?

Through my blog posts, I'll delve into the questions of the "in between" – join me on this exploration.